Let’s get into the article to learn 12 most important things you should never say to your Ex! It is confirmed when you have a serious relationship, and without any warning, you both have to get separated. After that, it becomes unbearably challenging to resist yourself from contacting your ex. Suppose you had a messy break-up, then it is normal to have many things you are dying to share with your ex. But for the sake of your well beings consider not to contact your ex. It may be irritating as hell and may require lots of willpower. But remember, there is a reason why you both got separated.
According to many experts, you may strive to contact your ex for many possible reasons. It may be for reconnecting with your ex, making your ex pay, or maybe for other possible emotional satisfactions. Whatever your reason, it advises staying away from contacting your ex. Your motives to meet your ex must be clear to get rid of those emotions and other issues.
No matter your reason, it may be better for both of you to get separated and avoid any contact. Unless you may be sure that it can go another way around, you can try to contact your ex with safety. You may want to prepare yourself for any possibilities. Here are the few rules to make a safe conversation with your ex:-
- Set up a few rules and boundaries between you two.
- Avoid specific critical conversations that can trigger each other’s anger.
- Consider avoiding too much eye and physical contact.
- Control your depression and desperation, which may make you needy.
- Consider consulting for professional help.
- Consider not to talk about the following topics.
Things You Should Never Say To Your Ex
It is natural to feel a bit broken emotionally when you break up with your ex, and in the heat of the moment, you may want to express your anger or depression to your ex. But it may be unreasonable to talk to your ex. It may highlight your desperation and create a wrong impression.
Due to separation, you may feel sad and depressed and can not figure out what to say to your ex. If it is your situation, then you can consider not to say the following things to your ex:-
Tip#1 Avoid telling; you miss the relationship
Your ex is most likely the one who proposed separation between you two. After the break-up, you may miss your former partner and the relationship, or you may be unable to move on from the good memories you and your ex had. However, keep in mind that everything happens for a purpose. If you want your ex to recreate your previous relationship so desperately, it may reveal your vulnerability and depression.
Your ex may be dating someone else and has moved on, but if you suddenly express a desire to be in a relationship with them again, it might indicate that you miss them. You may think it’s a kind gesture, but a scientific reality states you miss someone.
Also Read: Love vs Infatuation
Tip#2 Avoid telling; you are still in love
If your ex is the one who broke up with you, then it is normal to have the thought of confessing your love in front of your ex again. It may result in the same manner. Consider deleting those romantic and intimate thoughts with your ex. Remember that relationship is your past. You need to move on from that, and saying you are still in love will push your ex further away from you.
You may consider showing less interest in your ex. If possible, ignore your ex sometimes. That may be what you should portray. As a result, your ex may forget about the bad aspects of your relationship and may get attracted.
Tip#3 Avoid talking about your ex financial condition
Avoid judging or cursing your ex because his financial condition does not match yours. Every individual develops a suitable lifestyle. It may not be wise to talk to your ex about the poor lifestyle he leads. Your partner may portray you as a gold digger by talking and judging based on your ex’s financial condition.
When your main reason for your break-up is judging your partner for his financial crisis, you may need some professional counselling. Your ex does not become bad or problematic if he has some issues regarding finance.
Tip#4 Avoid convincing your ex about being friends
Consider how it would sound if you reconnected with your ex as a buddy. It has the potential to terrify you. How would you feel about hanging out with the same person as your buddy if you were previously in love with that person?
It may get awkward as soon as you imagine hanging out with your ex-partner as a buddy. You may be depressed due to your break-up, and you want your ex back in your life in whatever way you can. Your primary goal may be to rekindle his love for you, but it just serves to push your ex further away. Your ex may agree to spend out with you as a buddy, but your true motivations may differ.
Tip#5 Do not say you are depressed
Playing a sympathy card here may make your situation worse. Saying you feel lonely and depressed only makes you look desperate and needy in front of your ex. When your ex decides to split up, then your desperation makes your ex more egoistic. You may consider portraying yourself normal and happy.
When you feel you are back on track, you may consider contacting your ex. If you feel that you are looking desperate and depressed, it may not be time to contact your ex-partner. Consider involving in festive activities or going on a date with someone else.
Also Read: My Boyfriend Doesn’s Respect Me
Tip#6 Do not say everything about your ex feels terrible
Even if you are no longer together, that does not permit you to erase every unique and special emotion you shared while in a relationship. You may want to annihilate those special moments with your ex, but instead, take a deep breath and swallow your sadness and rage. If you’re dating someone new, try not to bring up your ex in front of your current partner because it may appear that you still have feelings for him and may make your current partner conscious.
Tip#7 Do not say you made a mistake choosing your ex
After the break-up, you may get miserable and depressed and want to express your anger to your ex for leaving you. You may wish to declare to your ex that; it is your mistake to choose you as your partner, but that may not be appropriate to say to your ex.
If you want to rekindle with your ex or want to get over your past relationship, then saying that it was a mistake to date your ex may trigger conflict between you two and push your ex further away from you.
If you feel depressed or sad about your ex for making you feel abandoned, take it out on something else. Here are a few tips to make you feel better:-
- Go out for exercise.
- You may consider following your passion.
- Do something that will distract you from the thoughts of your ex.
- Take admission to many co-curricular activities you have always wanted to.
Consider calling your ex when you have made your life back on track because contacting your ex while you are depressed may make you appear needy and desperate for love. That may leave a negative impression on your ex, causing them to drift further away.
Also Read: Guy Stops Talking to you
Tip#8 Avoid discussing what went wrong between you two
When you see your ex, don’t try to figure out what went wrong that caused you to split up. It is natural to feel melancholy and abandoned after being separated from someone wonderful. Still, you may want to consider preserving that person’s desire and value for your love for your ex.
Don’t get carried away. If you were the one who ended your relationship with your ex, you might have solid reasons. Consider doing something with safety if you believe your ex needs to care. If you believe your ex is still depressed, you may inform your ex that the reason for your split was personal and that you may want to stick to it.
Tip#9 Avoid telling you are much better without your ex
According to many professionals, telling your ex that you are better without him can be considered a cheap shot. Tearing a loved couple apart never feels good. You may regret telling this to your ex. You may get thrilled about lots of good things your ex-partner did for you, and saying you are much better now may not be much productive.
You may say or curse your ex in the heat of the moment, but you may feel regret after all your happy moments and efforts your ex indulges in you.
Tip#10 Avoid comparing your ex with your new partner
It’s tempting to make comparisons between your present relationship and your former. You want to make your ex pay for making you feel miserable and depressed. Maybe you feel better after bragging about how caring is your current one than your ex, but believe me, it may show your desperation towards your ex. You may move on from your past relationships and have someone special in your life.
Remember; if you have found someone you love, the credit also goes to your ex. If your ex does not leave you, you may not find your appropriate one. Your ex may have some valid reasons for breaking up with you. If you find your current one suitable for you, you have already won. So, it may be unreasonable to curse your ex, put some cute couple pictures with your current partner in your social media handles and consider yourself the winner.
Tip#11 Avoid telling “not to contact ever again”
If you tell your ex not to contact you again, you might as well forget about getting back together. After your two splits, you may want to avoid seeing your ex since you may lose control of your negative feelings, pushing your former further away from you.
If you wish to reignite your previous relationship, you may need to maintain some distance from your ex. When you lose someone you care about, it is natural to feel depressed, and in the heat of the moment, you may end up blaming your ex and give up all hope of ever seeing them again. Instead, kindly recommend that you retain some distance between you two and attempt to remain calm.
Also Read: How to tackle relationship issues
Tip#12 Consider professional help
If you are having trouble letting go of your melancholy and desperation from a previous relationship, you might want to seek professional help. It might be an effective tool for determining your requirements and removing negativity from your head. There must be a reason why they are experts. With their expertise and wisdom, you may be able to recreate your developed thoughts by acting accordingly; you may get what you want.
Many people damage their chances of rekindling their relationship with their ex by saying inappropriate things after the break-up. If you want to fix your past relationship, professional help can be an effective solution. Before attempting to communicate with your ex, you should be aware of the following points. Here are a few pointers to help you figure out what you can and can not talk about in front of your ex.
Things You May be Aware of Before Talking to Your Ex
You may wonder what may be the reason you need to sort out with your ex. Before talking to your ex, you may need to sort out your list of reasons that you feel necessary to speak. You may consider the lists of things you may not discuss with your ex to determine how you may approach your ex without pushing your ex away.
Here are a few topics mentioned that you consider talking to your ex:-
- When you are both in a relationship, you may chat about the problems your ex might be facing. Avoid excessive emotion, do not act so desperate in your approach, and communicate the issues you both have faced while being together.
- You may also communicate the efforts you have made to overcome those issues. It may be the beginning of your new bond.
- If you were in a relationship with your ex, you misbehaved for any reason, now is the time to apologize.
- You may want to avoid those discussions that may trigger past disagreements between you two. If you communicate with those issues with your ex, it may end up in conflict and push your ex further away from you.
- As discussed earlier, you may not want to talk about your current lover. Avoid talking about someone you have a little crush on for various reasons. You may want to consider talking about your new activities or the new co-curricular functions you signed in recently. You may want to portray yourself as strong, confident, and with no affection of reuniting with your ex.
- Even if that is about your past relationship, you may talk about some memorable moments you two shared. Your primary motive may be to talk about that excellent time you had rather than your relationship to help you reconnect.
- You may want to act like you both are now friends, nothing else, do not express your depression or feelings in front of your ex. You may talk about recent games that your ex prefers, but if your ex knows that you are not fond of any games, avoid talking about those things. It may reveal your desperation. You may also talk about some recent unusual incidents you experienced.
- You may act as a manipulator with your ex to talk about your future goals. Show your ex that you and your ex have the same dream. As a result, it may make you both close.
- And lastly, do not forget to ask about their close friends and families. Ask about their health without being desperate. You may advise according to your knowledge if your ex shares any of their family issues.
- You may also show your concern to your ex’s family member who is ill or at their last breath. It may be an appropriate reason to contact your ex. Or vice versa, if you have the same friends circle with your ex who is ill, you may address your ex to give the news.
These tips can help you break the awkward moments of you contacting your ex and help you communicate without any conflicts of any kind. Make sure that these ten things are not the limit. You may choose any topic that may lead to a healthy conversation with your ex. It is your situation you may know better than us.
Also read: 201 First Date Questions
Tips to Get rid of Contacting Your Ex
When you lose someone you care about, it’s natural to feel melancholy and sad; you may have grown accustomed to texting your ex-partner, but the question is how to stop calling or texting them.
So, to get rid of the obsession with texting your ex may be difficult but may not be impossible. And by following these few tips, you may succeed in getting rid of contacting your ex and getting over them for good.
Prioritize your thoughts
One of the most significant components of getting over a break-up is self-awareness, and it is the capability that will enable your willpower and confidence. As a result, you may never think of texting your ex again and get rid of constantly contacting your ex.
According to many experts, when it comes to contacting your ex, your ideas are the starting point of catastrophe or conflict. If you do not become conscious of your thoughts and do not prioritize your action, the emotions may hit you with immense power. As a result, it may become more difficult to restrict your affection toward your ex.
Call your close ones
As the song says, we all need somebody to depend on, and it is critical to make sure your support system is there for you after you have gone through a separation. They may be the ones to help you get over your ex. So do not get hesitated to call them if you feel having trouble getting rid of past relationship’s emotions.
Any challenging situation requires the support of friends and family. Ask them if you may WhatsApp them the messages you want to send to your ex instead of conversing. Make a copy of the text. Send it to a friend who is aware of your situation, and you can rely on them.
It may sound vulnerable, furious, or apologetic as you want. You may consider opening all your emotions in your writings. Remember to get your thoughts out of your brain and communicate your feelings. As a result, it may allow your mind to get relaxed and stable.
Also Read: Are you emotionally needy?
Try Distracting yourself from past relationship thoughts
When you are in long-term and healthy relationships, your mind is always obsessed with all the beautiful thoughts of the time you and your ex spent together. It is easy to get obsessed with your thoughts of your ex and the break-up. You may consider distracting your mind anyhow from the thoughts of your ex. Here are a few tips for distracting your mind from overthinking your ex.
- Have a night out with your friends. Consider going on a trip to somewhere you always wanted to go.
- Wherever feeling lonely and distracted, consider calling your close friends.
- Spend time with your families.
Exercising and other types of physical movement have boosted anyone’s mood, depending on their time and situation. So, after your break-up, go to that spin class you always wanted to go to. You may be happy with the result.
The endorphins generated through an exercise can assist you in maintaining emotional support. Being emotionally balanced and sound is an important element of distracting you from contacting your ex. The more vulnerable you are emotional, the more likely you may get rid of texting your ex.
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