Let’s explore What to Do After No Contact? Whenever you go a few weeks or months without contacting your ex in any way, you will always feel the need to reconnect with them. The only way you can break out of this period is by sending the first text, no matter what your ego or hurt self says. Texts that sound desperate or needy should not be included in this case. It’s okay to show vulnerability, but that needy and desperate text can make the opposite happen.
Your breakup ended with you doing the no contact thing, and now you’re wondering how to get in touch with your ex. If you have realistic and clear goals in mind, then you might want to consider texting them.
Define No Contact Rule
This rule is pretty self-evident: you have to cut off all contact with your ex for some time, allowing yourself and your ex to have the space you need to process your breakup. Putting in place the no-contact rule means cutting off all contact immediately, regardless of how difficult it may be.
What you do before no Contact period?
If you’ve just broken up with your ex, you should return any of their personal belongings so you won’t have an excuse to call or text them or meet up with them in the coming weeks. You get rid of all reminders of your ex, delete all of their contact information, block them on social media, and avoid speaking to them.
Whenever your ex attempts to initiate contact with you, you should inform them that you’re taking a break and ask them to refrain from reaching out during this time. You have some time to move on, heal, and gain a little perspective. Tell your ex why you don’t want them to call you.
Also Read: Love vs Infatuation
10 Things you do after No Contact
Schedule for No Contact Period
Establishing an end date for your silence can motivate you to keep it up, even if it becomes unbearably painful. If your ex is planning to break up with you, a month is generally considered enough time for you to reconsider. So, go ahead and follow it for as long or as short as you see fit.
To gain an advantage during your meeting with her, you will need to appear more attractive to her.
The more time you give yourself to improve your body language and vibe, the better you will be able to communicate with your ex. As a result, it requires the development of more masculine behavioral habits, and forming habits requires time and persistence. That is why you need to work on it ahead of time, days before your hangout. The no contact rule also makes improving your body language and vibration imperative.
Ask for Help
If you want to rekindle an old friendship, try this method. Your ex should be able to play the hero by being the bigger person. As a result, they might decide that they still love you and decide to help you.
Your right mindset may work some of the time, but it’s not enough to get your ex back. Your relationship ended because you were no longer together. There was probably something wrong with your relationship, and you probably needed the right skills and tools to repair it.
Developing this skill is an essential skill for everyone. There are arguments in every relationship. A couple who flourishes communicates effectively; a couple who falls apart does not. Communication can make your new relationship with your ex a wonderful experience if you learn how to communicate effectively.
Also Read: My Boyfriend Doesn’s Respect Me
It is an attractive quality to be confident in yourself & suppose you’re thinking about it now. You are physically attractive to your ex. Otherwise, your ex wouldn’t have engaged in a relationship with you in the first place. However, when people are in a relationship, they lose their confidence. Insecurity, neediness, or desperation can be signs of a lack of confidence. Your ex likely lost attraction to you because of a lack of confidence during your relationship.
It is possible to regain confidence again. Therapy and acceptance of oneself are the fastest paths to healing. If you want to increase your self-confidence, read some books on self-esteem.
You need to choose which medium you will use and then say what you have to say. It is likely that if you have done everything right up to this point, your ex will give you a positive response. You can try again after a couple of weeks if they are still angry or cold.
Show them Your Changes
It is quite common for couples to split up for various reasons. We do not put in the effort when we are far apart, pressed for time, or lacking in energy. Exes will not consider getting back together unless their circumstances have changed or if you provide solutions for the problems that they created.
By using the extra time to do other activities that help you grow, such as attending the gym, going on a hobby trip, taking a therapy session, etc., you can demonstrate this to them. As long as you demonstrate that you are spending time on things other than your business, you will let them know that circumstances have changed and that things will be different once you re-connect.
Be ready for difficult conversation
Nevertheless, it is likely that your ex still has a lot of doubts about getting back together. Make sure those doubts are addressed & you will need to do it effectively.
When it comes to effective communication in relationships, you should be able to handle this part with ease. You are also halfway there if you have done the legwork, becoming a more confident, attractive, successful, and better person.
To talk about it, you need to have the courage. Probably issues led to the breakup of your relationship.
Also Read: Guy Stops Talking to you
Keeping the conversation light-hearted isn’t always possible. It is important that your former partner feels connected to you. Having only casual conversations with someone does not create a connection between them.
When you are close to someone, you get to know them better. Both you and your partner discuss your feelings with each other. You become vulnerable to them.
End the Relationship
Yes, you can go on indefinitely without contacting them but sending a closing message helps. Your ex will realize they need to move on too if they were hoping to get back together. Ensure your message is clear and polite so that there will be no confusion.
What to Do after Sending a Message?
As soon as your ex responds, continue to evoke positive memories and reactions while maintaining the same casual tone. The ultimate goal of the conversation should be to rekindle the spark so that a face-to-face meeting can happen, however, do not rush to get too excited too soon. Think about how it should feel like go on your first date. This will be a long journey, so be patient and proud of you for starting in the right direction.
Also Read: How to tackle relationship issues
How You React after no contact if Your Ex Wants to be Friends?
There is a fear of ending up in the friend zone with your ex. However, it’s good news if your ex is interested in becoming friends with you. Their desire to be friends demonstrates their respect for you and their desire to be in their company. You will have more chances to attract them, connect with them, and help them get to the point where they are ready to reunite the more time you spend with them.
Mental well-being should be the most important consideration. Your relationship with your ex is affecting your mental peace, so do what you can to cut off and start another period of no contact with your ex. However, if you’re comfortable with being friends with them then continue your conversations with them and use this opportunity to re-establish the relationship you lost during your breakup.
Do & Dont’s After no Contact
Do Discuss Break Up face to face
The break-up situation needs to be addressed once you’ve established contact with your ex. The best way to talk about a breakup is face-to-face: just as no one likes breaking up over the phone, no one likes discussing a break-up over the phone, either.
- If you’d like to, you can say something along the lines of I’m glad to talk to you again. Ask: What do you think went wrong in our relationship after you’ve met and caught up a bit.
- You should respect your ex’s opinion and respond to it. Arguing with your ex will not help the relationship.
- In the case of your exclaiming you weren’t supportive, say you’re sorry. My goal is to improve that aspect of my relationship.
Do not talk bad about Your Ex
It may be tempting for you to complain about how much you hate your ex on the internet and to your friends. Please remember that these words may be used against you in the future. It is unlikely they would want to get back together if they learn that you are saying nasty things behind their backs.
Your ex does not need to be praised. Regardless of how you feel toward them, keep your feelings neutral or positive.
Also read: 201 First Date Questions
Do Forget Everything
You can use this message to clean up the slate with your ex and start fresh. By being honest and vulnerable to your ex, you can break down their defenses and make them feel comfortable communicating with you again.
Do not be Needy
However, if you have significantly changed since our last contact, the situation has changed. Once you learn the right mindset and skills, you won’t appear desperate to contact your ex.
It will be impossible for you to send anything that comes off as needy if you truly believe that. There is no point in trying to get your ex’s attention because they think you are needy at first. You will quickly prove them wrong with your actions and words. Because you’re confident and have the correct tools and skills, whatever you say or do will automatically make you look confident.
Do Ask For Advice
If you ask your ex for advice without mentioning the relationship, it can be a great way to reengage your ex. You may also reach out to them on your behalf or behalf of a friend if they have a particular skill set or area of expertise. It’s an indirect way to open up to people to ask them for advice, as they often feel honored when you do so.
Do not be Desperate
Having dignity and respect for you is important. It’s important to avoid contacting him for three weeks so as not to show desperation.
It’s not about playing games if the No Contact Rule is implemented correctly. The No Contact Rule prevents your girlfriend from losing interest in you. In other words, it aims to restore power balance.
All you have to do is avoid your phone. Be patient and let her call you first. Recapturing her interest in you and restoring her fading attraction with this method is positive and constructive.
Also Read: Are you emotionally needy?
If you are looking for new friends, a way to get back together, or closure, genuinely apologizing is a great start. In the long run, attempting to manufacture an apology as a quick fix will not work; it will only lead to more problems. Please do not expect an apology from your ex in return when you send this message.
Do have Some Sympathy
You can start a relationship rebuilding by showing them you still care about them. That shows you are keeping tabs on them to some extent, just like mentioning their accomplishment. If you want to become friends or get back together, you need to show off your compassionate and caring side.
Do not jump for Conclusion
Immediately deleting someone off of social media because of their social media triggered you shouldn’t be your decision. Don’t rush into making the call. Instead, give yourself a few days to think about the idea, and then make it when you feel at ease with your decision.
Do give something to think about
Your attention to them didn’t just fade away. This shows you still thought about your ex, even though you strictly adhered to the no contact plan. However, you won’t come off as overly eager, since it’s more about thinking about you than your text.
Something completely random is fine or you can tie it into your relationship somehow. This is a great way to re-establish contact in a non-threatening way and get them to reply.
Also Read: How to be more romantic in a relationship
Do not make same Mistake
Your relationship feels stuck when you think about all the mistakes. You blame yourself for the outcome, certain that you were the reason things went wrong. You can avoid self-critical thoughts by following the rule of no contact. You might be the sort of person who was not meant to be whether you made mistakes or not.
Do have proper timing of Sending Message
If you are not sure when your ex will act, send the message when they will not be doing anything. Your best bet is usually after dinner and before you go to sleep during the week. As responsibilities and the hectic nature of the workday won’t distract them, people aren’t making plans at that time, and you won’t worry about them thinking you’ve been drinking too late.
Do Remind your ex on Positive Memory
By disregarding the events that occurred during or after your breakup, you approach your ex in a light-hearted manner. You relate to them by reminiscing about an old time. You will most likely receive a positive response if they are ready to speak with you.
You should use this message to refer to a recent experience that triggered a positive memory of a past relationship. It’s best not to go too serious, and you will probably get a better response if you choose a humorous memory. In that case, you might choose a more sentimental memory if you’ve just gone through a messy breakup.
Benefits of No Contact Rule
As you gain more insight into reality, you’ll be able to make better judgments and decisions about whom you allow into your life and whether your ex was really the right person for the long run. A person you’re seriously considering committing to for the rest of your life should not raise red flags, and as you look back, you may become thankful that you saw these warnings.
Be in Control
It is well known that humans are social beings with an emotional need to be in touch with others. With more time passing, your ex will remember more of the good things about you as long as you practice the no contact rule. As you use that time to work on yourself, you will be able to heal those broken parts of your relationship faster. In the event that your ex contacts you asking, if you’ve been waiting for them to call, you decide what happens next.
You break the power dynamic by sticking to the no contact rule. As a result, you’ve stripped them of their dictatorship, which means you’re now in charge. When you are open to interacting with other people, you are taking your ex off their high horse–especially if they try to reach out to you but you remain committed to no contact. When you regain control, you are free to do whatever you want.
Taking the Responsibility
Your relationship will get a fresh start if you don’t communicate with your partner. You may not blame yourself or your partner. Taking responsibility for a breakup requires honest with you. Consider the aspects of your relationship that helped you grow as a person and helped you to grow as a person.
Let Your Emotion Pass
Making a powerful decision to control your emotions has been the first steps in realizing emotions don’t have to linger if you control them. Allowing it to pass and letting go of the need to respond back was helpful. After the emotion wore off, you didn’t have the urge to message him, so you deleted the text.
Relationships are drugs – treat them as such. The only way to get clean is to detox. You must take a break. Right after a breakup, your heart and mind are used to him being part of your life, so it’s understandable that you can’t imagine going forward without him. Nevertheless, perhaps it’s the most worthwhile decision.
In the end, you will be able to function normally again once the drugs have worked themselves out of your system.
Enjoy Your Life
In other words, it’s logical to assume that life is hard as soon as you’re out of a relationship. While it will take some time to get back into your old hobbies and habits, adhering to the no-contact rule can expedite things and remind you that you are not dependent on men in your life.
The more time you spend thinking about this man, the breakup, and everything that went wrong, the more energy you will absorb from negative people. It’s not like you were always confident and sexy. Conversely, abiding by the no contact rule can dispel negative energy and restore your sense of wellbeing.
Let Go of Fantasy
These portrayals of love and relationships paint a false picture of what should be, leading women to build fantasy worlds around their actual relationships.
Trauma is the result of fractured fantasies. There’s no denying that this guy is not perfect. There’s a possibility that he isn’t the right person for you. You should kill the fantasy and get to the bottom of it to come face-to-face with reality. You might not get what you want, but at least you’re not looking at love through rose-colored glasses anymore.
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