In this article, we will learn what is a live-in relationship, all golden rules along with benefits, principles, etc,
Let’s explore!
What is a Live-in relationship?
Unless you’ve been living under a rock at a different age like Patrick Star, you’re already aware that a live-in relationship is when two people live together without marrying. Gone are the days when living together was frowned upon in conservative societies such as India or elicited puzzled looks even in sophisticated Western societies. For couples in serious, committed relationships, it is now considered a rite of passage.
A live-in relationship can be the right choice for couples who are deeply in love but are terrified by commitment and stress brought on by the socially and legally recognized institution of marriage, or who simply consider it an antiquated construct. The two partners can experience the benefits of being a serious pair without committing because they are bound by love rather than marital regulations.
The discussion over live-in relationships vs. marriage will never end.
- Do you want to be like a couple of love birds living together before you test the waters of marriage?
- Or do you want to just have a fairy tale princess wedding ending?
The choice is yours. But before we get into the nitty-gritty of live-in relationship regulations, let’s take a look at some of the benefits and drawbacks to see if cohabitation is suitable for you and your partner:
Also Read: Why Do Men Pull Away & Lose Interest?
Benefits of Cohabitation or Live-in relationships
A live-in relationship can bring you and your partner closer than ever before, as well as develop other types of closeness. Here are some of the most important advantages of living together that can boost a couple’s bond:
Goodbyes are no longer necessary.
The meeting and parting cycle have come to an end. After dinner or movie dates, there will be no more goodbyes because you will be sleeping together. A live-in relationship can also help you save money because you won’t have to hunt for new hobbies and outlets to spend quality time together.
Get your day started together.
Watch the sunrise together over the first cup of tea or coffee. Starting your day together and being by each other’s side when you’re at your most vulnerable creates a special sense of connection.
There will never be a time when you and your partner run out of things to do together.
When you start living together, the number of activities you can do as a couple grows longer, and most of them don’t require complex planning or precise execution.
There are various ways to demonstrate you care for each other, from cooking together to performing tiny but meaningful romantic gestures like bringing your partner breakfast in bed once in a while or preparing their morning coffee just how they want it.
There are no labels to deal with
You get to spend your life with the person you love without being constrained by the constraints of marriage. A live-in relationship gives you the choice to choose to be together every day rather than being forced to be with each other by a piece of paper.
Personal boundaries and privacy
A live-in relationship also allows you to do things without anyone intruding on your personal space. You and your companion can be completely yourselves without being inhibited by curious eyes from outsiders.
It’s your house, your tryst, and you get to set the rules for your live-in relationship, determining what works and what doesn’t.
Also Read: How to tell love from a crush
Dealing with difficult topics such as money
Money is a sensitive topic for most relationships. Discussing money and figuring out ways to avoid economic hardship in the relationship becomes non-negotiable once you start living together. You learn to operate well together as you share finances, rent, bills, and savings.
Make a compatibility test
Living together will put your mental, psychological, physical, and romantic compatibility to the test, as well as offer you a realistic assessment of whether you have what it takes to navigate the highs and lows of living together. If you plan to marry in the future, you already have an idea of how your life together will be.
Disadvantages of Living Together or Live-In Relationship
These advantages of living together make it seem like the finest option for any couple who wants to be together for the long run.
Breaking up can be difficult.
Splitting up with someone you live with might be especially difficult if the relationship doesn’t work out. Aside from the immense suffering of leaving your current relationship, you also have to find out how to dismantle your lives and start over.
Cheating can hurt a hundred times worse.
Either partner may betray the other, and because the relationship isn’t legally protected like a marriage, adultery can be a deadly blow to the relationship.
This is not to imply that marriages are unaffected by infidelity. In a live-in relationship, however, the odds of reconciliation are much lower.
Inadequate familial and societal support
Families, unlike married couples, may not support you if you have a dispute or an argument. There is also minimal societal support, particularly for women in live-in relationships. If things go wrong, you might be left to fend for yourself.
Children may be without a family’s safety net.
In the event of a pregnancy, the man can easily leave, leaving the woman to deal with everything on her own.
- Most countries’ laws, including India’s, now require a man to provide child support to children born in live-in relationships.
- However, the child may still grow up without a father in their life if the man refuses to be involved, leaving the woman with no choice but to face the challenges of being a single parent.
The rights of the partner are not protected.
Unless everything is officially laid out in a will, you will not be able to inherit each other’s possessions. In the event of a partner’s critical illness or death, their family can take control and urge the other to step aside if they so desire. He or she would have no legal right to remain by his or her companion.
As can be seen, live-in relationships come with their own set of difficulties and benefits. It is up to the lovers to make it work so that they can reap the benefits while limiting the problems. That’s why it’s crucial to plan and agree on some ground rules so that neither partner feels taken advantage of.
Fundamental Principles for a live-in relationship
The Supreme Court of India acknowledged live-in partnerships for the first time as “domestic relationships” due to the case of in the case of S. Khushboo v. Kanniammal in 2010. The topic was covered in Article 21 of the Indian Constitution’s right to life, a fundamental right provided to all citizens.
The Court ruled that live-in relationships are lawful and so two adults can now live together and can under no circumstances be termed as criminals or lawbreakers. They have, however, become a contentious topic in terms of the types of live-in partnerships that are recognized.
In India, live-in relationships are not a new occurrence. According to legal experts, such relationships are now the standard in the country. Unmarried couples who choose cohabitation, or what is commonly referred to as live-in relationships, have their own set of obstacles daily.
According to relationship counselors, couples in such a living arrangement must remember specific dos and don’ts to prevent major stumbling blocks. Here are a few examples:
Family and friends should not be enraged.
This concept does not have to be understood by everyone, and not every couple has to adopt such means to continue a relationship. You can have a good conversation with your family and explain why you are confident in your decision.
You must reassure your family and ensure that whatever anxieties they may have will not affect you drastically because close relatives frequently find it difficult to accept such a scenario in the family.
According to experts, couples must calm any anxieties their families may have about their cohabitation without being married, such as what if there is a social backlash. Simply state that you are secure in your beliefs and that you intend to stick to them. Explain to them why you must act on your convictions.
Split up the chores
Both of you should divide the chores to allocate equal responsibilities, from doing the laundry to doing the dishes to cleaning the house. Even hiring a maid for cleaning and cooking must be a shared decision for both parties to benefit. If tasks and chores are not properly delegated, frequent squabbling and conflicts can quickly ensue.
Before you know it, you’ve turned into a miserable pair who can’t stop yelling at each other over minor infractions. With this taken care of, the two of you can live in harmony and avoid fights. Tasks must be distributed while taking into account one another’s tastes and lifestyles. This will ensure there is a smooth sailing cohabitation.
Understand why you’re taking this risk
A living-in relationship, like marriage, is a major decision. Make it carefully and not hastily. Only after you’ve been dating for a year or longer should you consider moving in together. Have a clear understanding of why the two of you want to live together and whether or not this will lead to marriage. This will prevent you from moving in with unrealistic expectations.
You might not like it if your partner spends every weekend clubbing all night, leaving you behind, borrowing money from you, or having other casual relationships. Thus, it is important to define the reasons for your live-in relationship, your expectations, and why you getting into this relationship, you must be able to answer what you are trying to achieve here.
Your partner may not want to be called to or regarded as your spouse and integrated into your family. It’s critical to respect that and be clear about why you’ve decided to live together, and explicitly articulating expectations might assist. That’s why it’s crucial to establish ground rules for a live-in relationship. You’ll never regret a live-in relationship if you do it this way, no matter how things turn out.
It is also important to know the benefits as well as the drawbacks (we even listed them above, so don’t be lazy and read them!). Do some introspection and make sure you understand what you’re putting yourself into. Consider whether you’re ready for such an arrangement and how you’ll deal with any complications that may occur in the future.
Create a budget plan
Respecting one another’s financial duties and always paying your portion of the house’s maintenance and care is one of the most crucial live-in relationship norms. A live-in relationship entails more than just sharing a room and coming up with new methods to spend time together without leaving the house.
You’re going to be running a house together now. Before you settle in, sit down and make a money management strategy. To prevent confusion or chaos after you move in together, decide who will be responsible for which expenses.
The ground rules for a live-in relationship should be established as soon as you and your partner move in together. This may be a challenging task. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to your common financial arrangement. Keep a firm grip on how to manage finances together, whether it’s acquiring houses together or purchasing everyday products for your household.
New members in the family
Now since you’ll be staying together and sharing a bedroom, you’ll be able to have sex at any hour of the day or night. First and foremost, talk to your partner about whether or not you want to start a family. If not, make sure you have a good contraception plan in place to avoid an unplanned pregnancy.
Also, talk about the possibility of an unintended pregnancy ahead of time and figure out what you’d do if that happened. This is one of the most important guidelines for live-in relationships. Accept that an unintended pregnancy may occur and that if it does, neither party will force the other to retain the kid or marry them but will act diligently.
Honesty is the best policy!
According to experts, live-in couples should not lie to hide their relationship status because this can lead to issues. If you’re renting a house, for example, you should ideally lay your facts on the table and inform your new owner of your current relationship status.
Also, the greatest moment to be completely honest about everything is when you’re in a live-in relationship. Remember that you’re not married, so there’s no need to lie to charm. Be honest with yourself, and your partner and you’ll both have a better idea of how well things can work out.
Develop Problem-solving skills together smoothly
The first several months of living there would be nothing short of a dream come true. However, once the allure wears off, there will be disputes, arguments, and annoyances. You should be able to deal with them calmly as a couple. Make sure you don’t make the mistake of making a hasty decision and then having to backtrack because of a minor quarrel.
Learn to be respectful towards each other even during conflicts, problems, or arguments. Also, please put aside your ego’s kiss and makeup once things are resolved. Don’t hold bad memories, forgive and forget is the way to go!
If couples learn to respect each other’s space and privacy, several common relationship issues can be avoided and addressed. Both partners must accept one another’s friends, decisions, aspirations, interests, and opinions, as well as provide adequate space for both the partnership and the individual to grow and prosper.
Spend time with your lover in a meaningful way.
Make sure your companion doesn’t feel overlooked or unwelcome. Spending quality time with your partner will increase the quality of your relationship and that’s one of the major reasons for moving into a live-in relationship.
So don’t ignore each other, do not flirt with others or use other jealous tactics, make up after fights. This is how you and your partner’s relationship will improve for the better. When you look back on your life, you’ll see that memories are the everlasting riches of your heart. Many things will come to an end, but some will last indefinitely.
Give in to your fantasies and passions.
The thought of exploring sexual fantasies and dreams is one of life’s greatest pleasures. Take advantage of this opportunity by giving in to their passions. While you have a lot of leeway in terms of experimenting and exploring sexual fantasies, you must not do so at the expense of consent. Respecting your partner’s wishes and obtaining their permission should be an unspoken rule in any live-in relationship.
In a partnership, mutual respect is vital. Relationships suffer when there is a lack of respect. Because everyone is unique, there will always be variances between couples. Partners must acknowledge and respect each other’s differences. They must assist one another in their development.
There are no relationships worth putting your self-respect on the line for. Allow no one to mistreat you simply because you adore them. One of the most powerful manifestations of love is respect.
Be you!
The list of things that could go wrong is enormous, but if you set some ground rules before you start living together, things will go smoothly. You may be sharing a home and a life, but don’t forget that you should have separate lives.
It’s important to know when things are about you and when they’re about your partner. You must remember that you are an individual. You’ll be watching each other’s good days and bad days, and while it’s good to be there and support your live-in companion, don’t mess with the relationship’s rules. It’s always handy to have some savings in case of the eventuality that you decide to end things.
Understand the legal stumbling blocks.
If necessary, seek legal advice to determine what level of legal protection is often assumed in live-in relationships. The Supreme Court has made observations and issued recommendations in this area from time to time. Keep yourself up to date on any new legal developments.
Thus, couples who decide to live together should observe these live-in relationship rules to prevent being treated like doormats. This will prevent either of you from diving into the unknown unprepared.
Furthermore, by adhering to these well-crafted live-in relationship guidelines, you can ensure that your partnership remains pleasant and agreeable and that you get the most out of it.
Be aware that a live-in relationship may come to an end.
Couples who have agreed to live together must also keep track of how long they will be together. You can’t stay in a relationship if you’re thinking about getting married. Even if marriage isn’t in the cards for you, don’t expect a live-in relationship to last forever.
Be aware that a live-in relationship may come to an end. If it does, you must accept it and concentrate on healing and moving on rather than frantically holding to the prospect of reviving a relationship that has reached its end. One of the most important live-in relationship norms is to accept and respect the other’s decision to make peace, patch things, and even part ways if needed, without drama.
When you realize you are friends who are lovers, living together is for you. You’re both delighted right now and wish to love each other. You don’t want to look into the future or the long term right now, but it might happen later – the keyword being “might.
Conclusion
Despite the social backlash on live-in relationships; are you willing to take things to the next level? Are you ready to risk for a reward? Do you think living together would be fun? If you answered yes, you’re on the right track and should consider a live-in relationship.
You’re probably bored of wasting time on sappy dinner dates and movie trips to maximize your time together as a partner. You should consider living together as it becomes increasingly difficult to say goodbye and return to your house without your sweetheart.
Furthermore, it will offer you a taste of what your life together would be like if you decide to marry. Being in a live-in relationship is the ideal approach to deal with the sorrow of being apart as it ensures you enjoy each other’s company. However, there are some guidelines to follow in a live-in relationship.
Rules? You could wonder what the rules are and why they exist. Living together can appear to be a joyful and exciting trip at first. The daily facts of life, on the other hand, might gradually obstruct all of the excitement and adventure, leaving you and your partner dissatisfied and always squabbling.
That’s why it’s critical to establish some ground rules and set some boundaries right away. Through this article we hope that you receive a clear run-through of the golden rules you must follow in a live-in relationship to achieve your happily ever after.
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