Let’s learn 10 Ways to Be Independent in a Romantic Relationship! There is nothing wrong with having ups and downs in a relationship, as most couples seek a successful and rewarding relationship. If you want your marriage to remain strong and healthy, you must work at it.
Like bank accounts, relationships also require deposits to enable withdrawals. When one partner takes & the other gives, the relationship may become challenging.
Wives can feel independent of their husbands in several ways. Making yourself the top priority and pursuing your hobbies and interests will help you feel more independent. The wife who does not feel like she is a burden to her husband may be happier and share more with him if she feels independent. Women who have the freedom to be they give more to their spouses, too.
10 Independent ways Romantic Relationship
Maintain your Own Identity
One person can’t meet all your needs, regardless of what romantic fiction or movies claim. Relationships can be adversely affected by expectations that are too high. Maintaining your own identity outside of the partnership is essential for maintaining your love connection, your family and friends interactions, and your hobbies and interests.
Create Your Boundaries
An individual’s personal independence and happiness are recognized and respected in all healthy relationships. You should discuss setting boundaries with your partner that preserve your independence and respect your relationship needs.
- When there are things you don’t feel comfortable doing for your partner, keep that in mind and tell them you’re not willing to do them.
- If you want to set boundaries, be direct, but be clear about why you are setting them; make sure your partner knows that the boundaries don’t influence your feelings for them.
- When defining your boundaries, avoid absolute language or threats. Your partner may become alienated if you use this type of language.
Commitment
Be sure to prove your commitment to the relationship. The way you treat someone shows them how much you love them. It is human nature to give our partners what we hope they will appreciate, but they may be more interested in another type of affection. Discover what they value and do your best to satisfy them. You must communicate openly and honestly about any issues in your relationship.
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Stand Up for your Importance
Compromise and sacrifice should always be part of any relationship, but you should make sure you are in control of your priorities and never let them slip. Do not let your partner sway your mind from what matters to you.
Compromising isn’t always a bad thing. Consider what values or morals are non-negotiable for you and adapt to reasonable compromises on everything else.
You should not change your personality to please someone else. You should find time to interact with an introvert in your relationship if you are an extrovert. If, for example, it is important to you that chores are equally divided, assert yourself in a firm but respectful manner. Your partner should be willing to accommodate you where you can, but not to the point of swaying you away from your values.
Finance
It is a delicate and unique topic, sharing finances with a partner. Relationship with money was established at an early stage by talking openly about money with each other. By keeping your finances independent while keeping them transparent allows you to maintain financial independence.
Self Awareness
Money is not the only factor that determines independence. One way to become independent is to become aware of one. Communicating your needs and desires to your spouse can help you feel more independent. When you are self-aware, you know what you bring to your marriage and what makes you unique. You bring that same attitude to your marriage when you are more content and independent within.
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Trust
You do not have to see other people if you want to maintain your independence. To maintain your commitment to your relationship, you should take some time off without betraying your partner’s trust.
You might consider having an affair if you are taking time away to reassert your independence. You feel overwhelmed and want to regain control of your life. A monogamous partner may find out about an affair and find it devastating to their relationship, and you may not be able to recover if you do so.
Have Your independent Space
Even if you live with your partner, you need to have a part of the house that is yours. If you have a separate room in your house that you can go to when you want some alone time with your partner, they won’t disturb you.
By describing the situation to your partner and communicating your need for personal space, you can ensure your partner won’t disturb you. Even if you lock yourself in a room, there is a need for your special one to know where you are.
- Put only your stuff in the area you’re setting aside as your own, whether it’s a room or corner.
- Besides being a place to spend time away from your partner, your independent space can also be a public place. It is not necessary for you to keep your space private from the outside world, but only for the context of your relationship.
- Have a space for your partner and encourage them to use it.
Have a New Hobby
Do the things you desire regardless of whether you are in a relationship. To maintain your sense of self and foster your independence, pursue hobbies and interests you don’t share with your partner.
You can use this opportunity to seek out a hobby that your partner doesn’t like. You can assert your independence and pursue a hobby that doesn’t require your partner to sacrifice anything.
Hobbies can not only provide an outlet for independence, but they can also contribute to your overall well-being. Hobbies such as painting, writing, and hiking can reduce blood pressure, enhance creativity, and improve satisfaction. You mention this to your partner when explaining why independent hobbies are a good idea.
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Take Some Time off
You must make sure to protect your own needs as an individual, even though you’re a part of a relationship. You don’t need to be afraid to take time to take care of yourself when you feel overwhelmed. There is no time limit to how long you can take a mental break, so it can last however long you need. You can sometimes get back to normal by taking a day to yourself.
You will feel a greater sense of self-worth and sense of independence when you can be by yourself without your partner. Absence for a long period will also enhance the attractiveness of your partner to you. It is important to discuss your independent mini-vacation with your partner first. Your partner should, paradoxically, support you in preserving your independence.
Importance of being Independent in Romantic Relationship
A special relationship with someone that you love is exciting, energizing, and fun. That is what it is like when two people become one. However, that’s not the whole story.
Two mentally strong individuals make up a healthy relationship. Both of them lead independent lives and enjoy sharing their lives.
- Whenever you need support, your partner will be there for you. When things get tough or when life gets hectic, each partner is comfortable relying on the other. Partnerships are at the core of every relationship. Trusting each other is such a wonderful thing.
- Being emotionally secure is a benefit to both partners since it enhances your sense of independence. Relationships characterized by two independent individuals tend to be better balanced. A healthy relationship is one where both partners are independent. No one is responsible for only one aspect of the relationship.
- It is more sacred and special to spend time with two individuals who have decided to be together. As important as it is for each partner to remain independent, sharing your hobbies and interests is an excellent way to spend quality time together.
- The relationship becomes more intellectually stimulating when each party is independent of the other. Every party will have fascinating and different topics to discuss if they bring their interests to the table.
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How to Maintain Success in Long Term Independent Relationship?
People change over time, so it’s easy to believe you know everything there is to know about your partner in a long-term relationship. Try to understand who your partner is and what their goals are as you are in your relationship.
Respect each other while staying curious about each other. Friendship is the foundation of every successful relationship, so do your best to inform your partner of the latest information. In order to be successful in a relationship, most couples are realists who acknowledge that their relationships will experience ups and downs.
Benefits of having Independent in a Romantic Relationship
Improvement in Decision Making
Relationships encourage you to make life decisions together, but it is still important to be aware of how you feel like an individual and what you want. You don’t need to harbor resentment that you’ve sacrificed too much if you’re able to separate your ideas from your partner.
Fulfill Your Goals
In a relationship, maintaining independence cultivates respect between you because you are not centered solely on each other.
An independent way of life means having a sense of self that is separate from your relationship and how it affects you. Your relationship should not come at the expense of your goals; do not forget who you want to be.
If you aren’t sure if you are still the kind of person you want to be, you can check in with your friends and family. The point at which you are no longer happy with who you are may indicate that something needs to change.
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Your Partner’s Growth & Independence
Relationships need to be balanced between its partners, and each partner should invest in the relationship as well as themselves. Ensure that your partner feels comfortable pursuing their independence and maintaining their sense of self-identity as well while nurturing yours.
Your partner must know that it is okay for them to spend time with their friends and family, go to a movie or concert without you, or pursue their hobbies without your interference.
Early on in the relationship, you should set expectations for independence. When you’re battling against codependent conventions that are already established in the relationship, it’ll be very difficult to foster independence in both partners.
Share more to your partner
In addition to having more to talk about when you do spend time together when you both participate in separate activities, you will also have more to talk about when you do work on your relationship separately. Having independence rather than detracting from the relationship contributes to its value.
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Drawbacks of too Much Independent Relationship
Not Allowing anyone to make You Happy
Perhaps you’ve witnessed it with friends; maybe you’ve had the same experience in your relationships. Those in love can become so dependent on each other for happiness that they lose sight of who they are apart from their partner. Keeping your autonomy is important to you and not defining yourself by what another person thinks of you.
Too much Ambition
Breaking down your cultural or personal notions of gender roles will allow you to truly be who you are, rather than what others want you to be. People don’t usually choose a career over a romantic relationship because of time constraints. As far as we’re concerned, it’s not the good times that get us distracted. If you have been busy to date, take a moment to consider what the reason is. You will gain valuable insight into what you want as well as what you don’t want.
Physical Intimacy
Intimacy discomfort can only be managed with communication. If you spend a long time with someone, you will likely experience a deep emotional connection. You and your partner might not become too physically intimate when you are too independent.
Struggle for Power
Identifying and expressing ourselves honestly is the biggest struggle, knowing what we like, what we don’t like, and how we intend to use them. Many times, compatibility is mistaken for liking similar things or sharing similar ideals in relationships. What truly makes a couple compatible is communication. You will only like something for a short time if it is what your new partner likes. Authentic care means joining your partner in things that they enjoy because you appreciate them.
Also Read: How to be more romantic in a relationship
Trust
It’s a big deal to decide to get into a relationship. You have to put effort, time, and emotion into it. Hence, if you are deciding to be in a relationship, it’s because of what you can offer rather than what you want from them.
Relationships are often forgotten when the sole purpose of them is for your partner’s benefit; then you do not get what you want. By letting go of expectations and allowing yourself to get to know someone uniquely rather than by anticipating what they will be able to provide for you, you are liberated from the debauchery of expectations.
Live Your Life on your Own
Everyone you care about has an opinion about how you live your life, whether it is your parents, your friends, or your boyfriend. Men can attempt to influence your decisions, and they can also try to control you. Your life is about making your own choices and living them without letting others control them.
Healthy relationships don’t have to worry about this. You may want to find a partner whose confidence allows for your independence.
Too Much Stubbornness
Having the feeling that you can survive on your own is important to many women. There is no need for anyone else to help you, and you don’t need someone to take care of you.
Being too independent to ask for help and being too needy are two sides of the same coin. Nevertheless, most men enjoy doing things for you since it makes them feel like they have contributed to your well-being.
Do & do not in a Romantic Relationship while being Independent
Do Enjoy
Enjoy each other’s company and celebrate your lives together. Your relationship will also benefit from trying new things together. Fun activities together are crucial as deep and meaningful conversations about couple issues can degenerate into disagreements that leave both of you feeling worse rather than better. Fun activities are the glue that holds your relationship together.
Do not have Dating Time
The activities and friends you have as well as your career keep you occupied. It’s hard to find time for romantic interests when you have so many things going on in your life. There is no doubt that any boyfriend will want your time for hours on end, and you do not have it to give.
You must make time for a relationship if you truly desire one. While you have a lot on your plate, you need to choose which are more important.
Do Maintain your Independence
You keep your partner informed and reassured no matter what you do to maintain your independence. Remind your partner that you are still invested in the relationship by telling them why you want to be independent.
Do not share all your interest
Keep your expectations in check & remember that your partner is not responsible for validating your interests. It is unrealistic to expect that your partner shares all your interests. There are times when people complain that their partner does not share their tastes. Nonetheless, a successful relationship should encompass individuals who share the same interests.
Do Plan your Future Goals
At the same time, it is also crucial that you maintain your own goals. Whether they are educational, financial, or personal, they should be kept in mind. Especially when it comes to finances and personal pursuits, it is great to share personal goals with your partner. The best way for me to hold my partner accountable is to encourage him. Taking note of your partner’s support is key here rather than relying only on their reassurance. This encouragement can be a useful tool to help you maintain focus.
Do not afraid of Disagreement
Other couples may argue passionately and raise their voices as they talk about their issues. Relationships are strong when you are not afraid of conflict, however. It is critical that you feel safe to express things that bother you without fear of retaliation, and that you are capable of resolving conflicts without humiliation or degradation.
Do have Feelings for each other
You must properly convey your concerns without hurting your partner’s feelings. Feel what it would be like to hear this conversation from them and put you in their shoes. You may think it’s their fault that you want to spend less time with them, which hurts them.
Do not Destroy your Bond
After marriage, if you are dependent on just one person, you are likely to suffer from a victimized relationship. If both sides have lower expectations, you can enjoy your whims without stepping on your spouse’s toes. Therefore, you get varied from your independent times that further ripen the bond between you and your spouse. The relationship feels fresh without feeling trapped.
Do gain Valuable Knowledge from Argument
It is rare to achieve positive results by going on the attack. Embrace disagreements and resolve them respectfully. The strongest predictor of divorce is disrespect, whether it is expressed orally or physically. Our relationship can be negatively impacted when we become overwhelmed by an argument.
Do Socialize
You have a greater opportunity to network through socializing, which once again helps to advance our personal goals. Family time is also an important part of this. You’ll probably spend holidays with the extended families on both sides of the family if you’re in a long-term relationship. There is something really special about going on one-on-one visits to family members or having dinner alone with a close relative without your other half.
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